I am a 20-year-old woman. I did O-Level but did not pass even one subject.

Instead of just staying at home I decided to come to town and work as a maid. The woman I work for is a true Christian because when I hear stories from other maids dzekuti vanobatwa sei I am very shocked. The couple I work for is quite a young one they only have one baby boy aged two, they are both in their late twenties. Baba vacho made advances one weekend when the wife was out on a workshop. I wanted to report this to his wife but he told me that he loved me more than his wife and would want to marry me as a second wife. He has so far bought me a beautiful top of the range cellphone inotokunda yaamai mufunge.

This has been going on for a year now. When his wife is away I also call him by his first name. My mother has no problem with this because she said to me adiwa adiwa hake chero achida kukuroora. He is a very generous man he gives me money, now I can afford to send provisions to my family back home. The reason why I have written to you is I am now two months pregnant and all of a sudden he doesn’t look as keen as he used to.

He used to come back home during odd hours pretending to have forgotten something asi rwuri rudo rwekuti timbofara. I suggested that he gets me alternative accommodation before I bulge up, now he says dzokera kumusha tozoronga uriko. Do you think if I go home he will come and marry me? Do you think his wife will embrace me as an equal? Please help, I do not know what to do.

Response

I know you did not pass your O-Level but for someone who went up to that level you sound so foolish and show a very low reasoning capacity. A woman of your calibre aspiring to be a second wife kutoronga kunoita chigamba, why? This guy did not rape you, you fell for him willingly.


In your own words you say his wife treats you with respect, she does not treat you as a maid so why bite the hand that feeds you? I am shocked by your mother’s comments kuti adiwa adiwa, what a parent! I thought she would be mad at you. At her age she should know that love triangles are full of risks in the wake of diseases such as HIV and AIDS.

There can be violence or even deaths when such affairs are exposed. Your mother would rather have a box of groceries than protect your life, what a shame. You did not do well at school I thought this was a good chance to improve yourself academically because learning does not end. You should have known better, this guy was just taking advantage of you he never loved you at all, maybe to him you were his stay in concubine (pfambi). He knew you were so petty wakazvipotsera because of a few extra dollars and a phone. The saddest thing is baby is on the way and you have no plans for the kid. It is cruel to create families you cannot take proper care of. The child may temporarily bring your plans on hold because unomusiira ani uchitsvaga basa?

I base my response on your letter, you say this guy is no longer as keen as before so I doubt very much if he will come to marry you. To me he is just an abuser and a womaniser who took advantage of a poor maid. If the wife finds out obviously she will not be amused considering that she treated you well, she may go legal and sue you for adultery. Personally I think the best thing is to quit employment and go back home before the cat is out of the sack.

When baby is born go to court and claim for child support. Close this nasty chapter in your life and move on, leave this guy alone he has already messed up your life.

You are still young and full of potential usade zvechipari you should not spend the rest of your life as a second class citizen uchimirira duty rekuti baba vanouya rinhi kwako. If you want a good life you have to work for it do not sell your body for food and phones. Keep your pride. I would be happy to hear from you again.





Comments   

Bee
0#Bee2016-02-27 11:22
heyaaaaa kufuririka naiwooo ma touchscreen akati kuuya iway
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Philosopher
0#Philosopher2016-03-10 20:45
Foolish indeed
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Onesoulzim
+1#Onesoulzim2016-03-14 14:13
Musanyeperane, being muguru does not make one second class. You can only make yourself a second class if u cant fend for yourself and your children even if u are one in merriage. Many cultures and religions cater for multiple merriages, this is so from biblical times god rewarding his favoured subjects with many wives and children. Denying this living fact has led to increased prostitution, multiple mistresses taking multiple men, the real cause of hiv. once you are in guru find yourself methods of archieving economic independence with the help of the father of your child and maybe his wife too. Men dont like guru becoz of financial strain but they uncontrollably want sex. You will also need sex everytime so u in it now. Dont be fooled to be arborting or absconding, go home and tell your story if u are to be married it will be from yor own home. Love the father of your child, love to work and respect his wife and her home. Enda kumba kwenyu undotangira pasi just like his wife did
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Mwana waMujuru
-1#Mwana waMujuru2016-03-14 20:26
OnesoulZim I like your honesty . mai chisamba venyu ava vacharasisa vanhu vakawanda nedzimwe advice dzavanopa vanhu . Who told you kuti a second wife chigamba . maybe this girl akavharwa or not , noone knows but dont generalise barika and label it a bad thing . After all the so called one woman men varikungohura in secret which makes the polygamer better because he has made his intentions known . Zvekuhwandirana ndizvo zvonourayisa vanhu nechirwere . men should just be honest . Sando dzese to the polygamers for being honest and avoiding chivi cheAldutery or Fornication . Big up varume(polygame rs) for kumira pachokwadi
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counselor t
0#counselor t2016-03-14 22:21
counsellors are not supposed to be judgemental but impartially listen, explore, identify source of problem, work out solutions together with client. Kupopotera client is NOT counsellor-like .
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rudairo
0#rudairo2016-03-15 09:23
Kupopotera kuri right, she will be decisive. she deserves so for betraying her madam. Just like munhu wese ane ruchiva, unotofanirwa kuzvidzora, the bible says the flesh tells you to do something dies not mean you just have to follow what your flesh wants. otherwise people should be rewarded for stealing ka because munhu wese anoda mari nezvakanaka.
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The Great
0#The Great2016-07-25 13:42
ya
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