Hie Aunty Lisa
I started masturbating nearly 5 years ago. I first masturbated lightly and it was fun, was not addicted. I have masturbated nearly everyday. In the last few months, it became very obsessive.
Things got gradually worse. I found that if I apply a lot of pressure to my erect penis while lying down, it is very enjoyable, so that’s what I did – the weight on the penis was also applied to the urethra, since it was below the penis when lying down on my back. I increased the weight over time. In the last few days I have noticed a change in my urination. I no longer pee for a long time – my urination is usually shorter than 10 seconds, even if I drank a lot of water.
When I feel like I have to urinate, I go and do, but the sensation of having to urinate doesn’t go away. I have to go multiple times over 1-2 hours until this sensation of having to urinate is gone – I pee little every time, so it takes multiple times over a few hours to make it go away.
I researched online and seems that it is urethral stricture, basically a condition where you have scar tissues in your urethra. The symptoms are having to urinate frequently, yet not being able to urinate a lot every time. The treatments are painful and it can come back. There’s a surgery, but it requires having a catheter in your abdomen for a few months, I think.
I definitely fucked my life up, hard. I can’t sleep at night because of this. I go multiple times until I have relief from that annoying sensation.
I didn’t know that simple weight can cause this. I thought you need a traumatic hit to your urethra, but it seems like it can happen from much simpler things.
I have not masturbated for 48 hours and I still suffer from this. I’m really afraid to see a doctor, because urethral stricture leads to suffering. I can’t believe that just for that euphoria I fucked up so hard. The only thing that gives me relief is to significantly limit my water intake, but that’s dangerous.
My urine stream is also weak. This is also worrying. I still have a feeling of constant pressure on my groin that worsens if my bladder is full.
Did anyone else here had it happen? I’m really freaking out here. Last night I fell asleep at 5 AM (went to bed at 2 AM) because I had to get up and urinate frequently, until the sensation of having to pee was gone.
Other severe problems that affects my life are mentally related:-
- Low confidence
- Sadness on my face every time- like a poker face, people always say to me that you look sad, low-energy.
- I can’t smile now my facial expressions are not good, even when I smile it seems that it’s fake that doesn’t come natural – (I was very happy and jolly person in my childhood but now everything lost).
- Weak memory.
- I can’t communicate to anyone properly- can’t have eye contact, very soft voice, my heart-beat increases when I talk to strangers I feel they are noticing me that my face looks different, like with my friends, family members, relatives, even with mother- that’s the worst.
Please don’t do this to yourself. I ruined my life, and don’t want you to do the same.