Dear Aunty Lisa
I am 22 years old. I am currently on medication for depression. I was a strong believer in Christian religion until Satan attacked me and I lost my faith. I believe God gave me more than I can handle.
While I was going to university, I met this guy on campus. Since I was a Christian, my parents had forbidden me to have boyfriends while I was in high school, and so I didn't have much experience with men. I was struggling with the degree I was pursuing and this guy used to offer motivation and comfort to me. I eventually started liking him until we ended up in a relationship.
The first time this guy had se_x with me, he removed the cond0m without my permission. He knew I was a vir_gin. I remembered getting so angry and he apologised.
He said it was a stupid mistake and he just wanted to know how a vir_gin felt. However, after having several se_xual experiences with him, I realised this guy's pen_is had an awful smell when he took off the cond0m.
I told him to go get it checked out, and he told me it was the alcohol that he had been drinking; but I knew something was wrong.
So I started doing my research and realised that he had a se_xually transmitted infection (STI) because I started having some bumps on my vag_ina. I started to investigate and searched his phone, and I realised this guy was not as innocent as he pretend to be.
He had been with many women prior to me, which he lied about. He was cheating. When I went to get a check up, I tested positive for her_pes type 1 and 2, trichomoniasis and bacterial vag_inosis. I also found out that he had passed on the virus to another female before me. I have never felt so low and stupid in all my life. Now no man will ever want to be in a relationship with me. You know how judgemental Zimbabweans are.
After I ended the relationship, this guy started another relationship with a girl and kept boasting that she gave him oral se_x. She is now aware that he gave her STIs I know because she texted me once.
I don't understand why she is still in a relationship with him. I feel he has told her some lies, the way he used to lie to me. How can a young man be so evil?
I honestly feel suicidal. I have lost hope in life. What can I do, aunty? I tried praying and I see no improvements. Why me? I sacrificed my virg_inity and now I have to live with these scars.