Dear Aunty Lisa
I am a prominent reader of your ASK AUNTY LISA column on the myzimbabwe.co.zw website and the thought of writing to you never crossed my mind, but I find myself in urgent need of your help. I am a 42-year-old woman. It’s like I don’t seem to have luck with men.
My ex husband and I couldn’t get along. He was so jealous, I felt cramped. He used to watch my every move, search my phone and my clothes daily. I worked with men and women too but the men and I got along well. If I made the mistake of talking to him and mentioned one of these men’s names, right away he would accuse me of having a relationship with him.
We went for counselling and when I thought that he would improve, he accused the counsellor of taking my side because the counsellor wanted to have a relationship with me. When I told the counsellor what he said, he said to me, “Don’t worry, this sort of thing happens all the time”.
This man would not give me any money to shop. I had to use my own money. He claimed that he was using his money to send his daughter to college. One day we had a little argument and he kicked me and I fell to the ground. I was unable to go to work for three weeks. I did not report him to the ZRP because I was too ashamed. I didn’t want anybody to know that I was beaten by my husband so I filed for a divorce.
Then I met this man on Facebook. He claimed he loved me. We dated for eleven months then we got married. I wanted to get married in a church but he did not want that, so we got married in a private ceremony. Now, I regret marrying him. I have never enjoyed having se_x with him. He has a very small peni_s and when he should be having se_x with me, he turns on his side and plays with himself. He enjoys having oral se_x. When he inserts it into my puss_y, I dont feel anything. When I try to do some bedmatic skills it slips out of my vagin_a.
When I come home from, without going to the bathroom, he pulls down my underwear and goes down on me. I told him that he is crazy and nasty but that does not bother him.
Aunty, I don’t know what to do. I don’t have any children. I don’t want to let any of my friends know what I am going through because I am afraid that they may spread it around. Please give me your advice. What should I do.