PLEASE HELP: I’ve fallen deeply in love with a married man who won’t leave his wife


Dear Aunty Lisa

I AM having an affair with a married man I met through work. I love him deeply but I know it is only lust on his part.

I work for a catering firm and my job involves visiting potential and current client companies.

At one of them I met this wonderful-looking guy. He was easy to talk to and very attractive. He is 32, I am 26.

I think I fell for him right away. I never thought I would do that but it was love at first sight. I couldn’t wait to see him again.

The next time I was at his workplace we chatted some more and had a coffee in the canteen. He said he would like to keep in touch. I agreed because I wanted to get closer to him.

To be fair he was honest with me. He said early on all he wanted was an affair. I went along with that since it seemed to be all that was on offer — but now I am deeply in love with him.

We meet up whenever we can and either he comes to my place or we book a hotel room. We are adventurous in bed and have such fun together.

He says his se_x life with his wife is very dull and doesn’t happen often anyway.

She won’t try anything different in bed while I am happy to try anything new.

But even though his marriage is so dull, he is scared to get involved with anyone else.

His wife is the one with the money, her parents bought them their home, so he has a lot to lose.

We have been seeing one another regularly for over three years now. I know we are so very right for one another but he is not going to change.

It breaks my heart to realise he doesn’t love me enough to want a future with me.

Wanting to be with him so much is stopping me from finding someone else to get close to and share my life with.

I feel I am stuck with a problem of my own making.

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