Dear Aunty Lisa
I had been dating this girl for about a year and four months. From the beginning, I already knew she was hard to love. We met online. She hurt me countless time and I shed tears. When she asked for things, I gave because I love her: car, money, time, love, space, understanding. Whenever and whatever she asked, I gave, no matter what. Yet she questioned whether she could trust me with her future.
Perhaps I was too easily swayed. I changed jobs, rooms, routines, even the car because it would give us an advantage in the future.
But it was never enough for her. I was never enough.
We even argued that my shirt was too dull for dates. It was faded but not dull. I even went to the extent of eating vegies for a month to save up for our “anniversary”. It was a one-time thing and I accepted the consequences.
After one year, she still found petty stuff to argue about.
I chose her above all. I lost my friends and my family’s trust, time, money, love and everything because of my decision.
She hurt, criticised, insulted, ignored me – and then dumped me.
As a matter of fact, I knew she was harmful to me. Yet after all this, I still love her to death. I accepted suffering for her.
When she hurt me, I always believed there was a higher force watching, that God was watching, and perhaps she might come to understand what I was going through.
I held on to a hope that was later shattered.
Was I simply asking the wrong girl? Am I an idiot? Have I trusted God too much?
I felt so stupid picking love over everything. I want my car back but she has since registered it in her name. I called her last week and she said I will repossess the car over her dead body. She said I will not get it back since I bought it for her. What should I do?