HELP: My girlfriend didn’t bleed the first time we had se_x, does this mean she was not a virg_in?


Dear Aunty Lisa

My girlfriend swears I was her first, but she did not bleed the first time I penetrated her vagi_na with my erect peni_s. Does this mean I was not her first?


No, not always. Some women will bleed after having se_x for the first time, while others will not. Both are perfectly normal.

A woman may bleed when she has penetrative se_x for the first time because of her hy_men stretching or tearing.

The hy_men is a thin piece of skin that partially covers the entrance to the vagi_na. For some women, it may stretch or tear when they start having se_x.

Having a stretched or torn hy_men does not necessarily mean a woman has lost her virgi_nity.

The hy_men can also stretch or tear quite easily before a woman has se_x for the first time, through:

  • activities such as horse riding and other sports
  • using tamp0ns
  • mastur_bation

A woman may not know her hy_men has stretched or torn, because it does not always cause pain or noticeable bleeding.

If you’re concerned about bleeding after se_x, get advice from a GP or your nearest se_xual health clinic.

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