My girlfriǝnd donated her kidney to save my life, but I don’t love her anymore – What should I do?

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Dear Aunty Lisa,

I hope this letter finds you well. I am a young Zimbabwean man seeking your advice on a delicate matter that has been troubling me. My girlfriǝnd donated a kidney to save my life, and for that, I will forever be grateful. However, I have come to realize that I no longer have romɑntic fǝǝlings for her.

I don’t know how to break this news to her without hurting her fǝǝlings and making her regret her decision to donate her kidney. I am torn between my gratitude for what she has done for me and my desire to pursue a relɑtionship with someone I am genuinely in l0ve with.

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I feel guilty for not reciprocating her fǝǝlings, and I don’t want to be unfair to her. How do I approach this situation without causing her pain and regret? I don’t want to be seen as ungrateful, but I also don’t want to lead her on.

Your advice on this matter would be greatly appreciated.

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Aunty Lisa Responds:

Dear Tinashe,

Thank you for reaching out to me with your dilemma. First and foremost, it’s important to acknowledge the sacrifice your girlfriǝnd made to save your life. It takes a lot of courage and selflessness to make such a decision, and she deserves your gratitude and respect.

However, it’s also important to recognize your own fǝǝlings and emotions. You cannot force yourself to l0ve someone simply because they did something incredibly kind for you. It’s understandable that you may feel guilty for not reciprocating her fǝǝlings, but it’s better to be honest with her than to lead her on.

I would suggest having an open and honest conversation with your girlfriǝnd. Let her know how much you appreciate what she has done for you, but also express your fǝǝlings and thoughts about your relɑtionship. Be gentle and compassionate in your approach, and avoid blaming or attacking her.

It’s natural for her to feel hurt and disappointed, but ultimately, it’s better to be truthful than to continue a relɑtionship that is based on gratitude and obligation rather than l0ve and ɑffection. Encourage her to seek support from family and friends, and offer to assist her in any way you can.

In the end, it’s important to prioritize your own happiness and well-being while also being respectful and considerate of your girlfriǝnd’s fǝǝlings. I wish you all the best in navigating this difficult situation.


Aunty Lisa

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