Dear Aunty Lisa,
My name is Takudzwa. I am a 25-year old man from Harare. I need your advice on a difficult situation I find myself in.
I have been dɑting two wonderful women for the past couple of years. The first is Sarudzai. She grew up in rural areas like I did. She has traditional values and is family oriented. We understand each other’s backgrounds and cultures. She is patient and hard-working.
The other is Tsitsi. She grew up in the city and has a modern outlook. She is ambitious and wants a career. She challenges my thinking and introduces me to new ideas. She is fashionable and social.
I care about both of them deeply and cannot choose between them based on feelings alone. They are each perfect for me in different ways. Sarudzai would likely be content with a traditional husband and housewife arrangement, while Tsitsi wants a partner who supports her career goals.
Aunty Lisa, I need your wise counsel. Which woman do you think would be best for me in the long run? I value having a caring, supportive wife who will raise good children and keep a happy home, but I also want a partner who will motivate and inspire me and help our family grow.
Please give me your frank but kind advice on which woman you think I should mɑrry. I will take your advice with an open and grateful mind.
Thank you in advance,
Aunty Lisa responds:
Thank you for writing to me for advice on this important decision. I understand this is a tough situation to navigate, but with care and wisdom you will make the right choice.
My first piece of advice is to not rush into mɑrriage. Continue dɑting both women for now and spend time reflecting on which relɑtionship truly nourishes your soul. Get clearer on your priorities and values – what do you really want from a wife and partner?
From the limited information you provided, both women seem l0vely in different ways. However, I encourage you to evaluate which woman shares your core values and long-term goals. A shared vision and compatible outlook will ensure a strong foundation for your marriɑge and family life.
Practical factors like living arrangements, finances, and children also matter. Talk openly with each girlfriǝnd about these topics to determine compatibility.
Most importantly, follow your heart. While intellect and practicality have roles to play, your intuition often knows best. Trust the woman who makes you feel most alive, confident and inspired to be your best self.
Above all, be kind and honest with both women. They deserve clarity and closure, even if it means losing you. With patience and an open heart, the right choice will become clear to you in time.
I wish you all the best on this journey, Takudzwa. May wisdom guide you.